Who Really Knows What Forgiveness Is?
Woking with Enlightened Spiritual Masters can offer us an understanding of "Forgiveness," and what it TRULY means to forgive, with a rare and much greater level of clarity than typical psychology, philosophy, or newer age spiritual teachings afford. True "Forgiveness”, as explained by highly revered Saints and Enlightened Teachers, involves letting go of our upsets, blame, hurt, and guilt to the extent that we return back to our ‘True Innocence’ of mind… as-if-the-incident-or-trigger-never-even-happened! In other words, forgiveness can bring us back to our Divinely Innocent Mind, free of any upsets or grievances -- similar to that of the mind of a little puppy or a little child!
How many of us say, "You know… I can forgive -- but I can’t forget"? Isn’t this evidence of only a partial letting go of our past? How many of us clear our mind to the ‘nth degree, so it feels like no hurt ever even happened in the first place? This is a very high bar, but Spiritual Masters say that the work we put into achieving such a level of forgiveness is absolutely essential to our own self-forgiveness, self-love, and reclaiming our own true innocence -- the divine innocent self of ours -- which has never, ever, been tainted!
If we feel anything other than unconditional love for someone, it is a sign we are still holding on to some grievances, upsets, or pain which is not allowing us to love them as if we met them anew, like how a puppy would view a person for the first time -- with total acceptance and joy, and without any judgment whatsoever.
This may seem difficult, but from an early age as a teenager, I studied spiritual books which were dedicated to helping us understand and achieve forgiveness, like “A Course in Miracles”, and the works of Gerald Jampolsky and Mariann Williamson, who wrote commentaries based upon it’s philosophy. This paralleled the teachings of Saints and Enlightened Spiritual Masters from the Hindu, Buddhist, Sufi, and Christian religions. Seeing total perfection & beauty or seeing the divine “Christ” in others, was always for me one of their most admirable and incredible peak spiritual experiences and attainments.
Many people can “white wash” their vision to try to forgive and see the divine in others, but it’s not the same as truly cleaning all the subtle layers of the mind to achieve this ultimate perception. The practice of “white washing” was an old means of dealing with say a dirty fence or barn. Instead of thoroughly cleaning and stripping away all the dirt to find the pure white paint underneath all the accumulated layers of grime, ‘white wash’ was splashed on the wood – no washing needed – to immediately give the appearance of whiteness and clean.
I recall telling an Enlightened Spiritual Master at whose ashram I was staying, proudly about a practice I had of ‘trying to see God in everyone.’ He told me that instead, “You should try to see people ‘As They Are.’”
After much reflection, I believe He was telling me that I was wrapping people in a kind of ‘divine cloak.’ This is a form of a ‘spiritual by-pass’ for actually (1) letting people bring up whatever they bring up in me, and then in the face of this, (2) doing the inner work to completely and meticulously clean my mind. Such work involves facing someone, and mentally fully feeling all the gross and even subtle buttons or triggers a person brings up for me, and venting all the feelings which arise. This is not unlike ‘Exposure Therapy’ in psychology, and what children do naturally in the face of what triggers them.
For example, if a person has, say, a cat phobia, one therapist could recommend to his client, “Well Mr. Jones, why not try to see them as little puppies, you like little puppies, don’t you?” Well, this would be a quick by-pass, and perhaps it could allow Mr. Jones a certain degree of freedom while walking outdoors. But what if a cat were to all of a sudden come up to him, or jump in front of him? Or, what if he were asked to a friend’s home who had a cat? These would be very challenging tests for him – not to mention if Mr. Jones were to be offered to try to pet a cat, or even hold a cat.
On the other hand, if another therapist were to try to offer Mr. Jones real freedom around cats, he might recommend several sessions of ‘Exposure Therapy.’ In session 1, he might have Mr. Jones use virtual reality technology showing a cat nearby, and take Mr. Jones through an exercise to vent and release all of the fear and upsets which were arising in him. In session 2, he could have Mr. Jones repeat the exercise with a live cat in a cage in the same room as him. In session 3, he may have Mr. Jones vent and release his feelings with a cat who is free to roam around in the same room. And, ultimately, in session 4, he might have Mr. Jones try to hold a cat, and let go of all the emotional tension, fear, and aversion he felt while doing so.
Virtual Exposure Therapy
Over the years, I’ve developed self-healing process which can quickly bring myself and clients through this kind of ‘exposure therapy’ process, very rapidly, in as little as 30-60 minutes. During theses processes, people visualize any person or thing which brings up unhealed feelings of upset, and they can vent all that is arising to achieve a state of total forgiveness, re-experience pure, innocent, untainted love, and clear their vision to seeing only total perfection and beauty.
I've strived over many years to attain this innocence of vision -- and now it comes to me daily, as a result of doing my spiritual practices. At each day's end, I work diligently, using various tools at my disposal, to clear away all the debris in my mind, to come to a vision of light, love, and joy in the midst of all I've been dealing with in relationships and events in the preceeding day.
With each clearing we do on forgiveness and seeing true perfection & beauty in others, not just one subject in our lives is affected, but an exponential number of people and things who have similar qualities (i.e., who tend to push similar buttons in us) get worked on too. Clearing our issues and upsets about one person or thing can thus positively affect hundreds if not thousands of our future interactions and relationships. And with each clearing practice we do — while looking at a person or thing which is actually a ‘mirror’ of ourselves — we become so much more loving and accepting of our own-selves in the process of forgiving others!
An epic example of this kind of surrender is found in the example of Nelson Mandela, ex-president of South Africa (1994-1999). He seemed to have somehow found True freedom after being subject to the worst forms of treatment..
In an interview after 20 years of false imprisonment, torture, terrible oppression of his family, and having his wealth and properties stolen from him, he was asked to explain his feelings about everything he had been through. He was asked, "How can you forgive these people of their terrible crimes against you and your family and your country?" Mandela responded, with a beaming smile, and utter inner serenity, "I'm finally out of prison... I'm forgiving them for 'me', not for them. Hating them and not letting go of my anger would only continue to keep me in prison. Let them face whatever consequences that their actions will bring upon them, that's not my concern.. I forgive them because "I" want to live the rest of my life in joy, peace, and freedom!"
Working to achieve true forgiveness is one of the most powerful soul cleansing endevors we can embark upon, if we wish to speed forward on the path to greater peace, happiness, joy, and love in our lives.
(See the blog article “How to Quickly Burn Karma” — for more insight and discussion on soul cleansing and speeding up our inner growth.)🌈🌈🌈
